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Leukemia Battle

My battle with Leukemia with the Lord as my guide. read about page

Latest journal entry

Intensive Care

It has been a very long week and a lot has happened to us. Last Thursday Christa and I were sitting in my hospital room watching television and I was just completing a blood transfusion. Suddenly I could not catch my breath. The nurses started working to help me and in a matter of minutes I realized I could only take one more breath (I was not able to expel any air). I grasped Christa’s hand and as I blacked out I was reassured by God that this was not the day I was appointed to die. Christa however did not get his message and had to endure a horrific encounter as the various teams were brought in and code blue was called out. A chaplain came and ushered Christa out of the room so she didn’t witness the paddles in use, but she was very aware of what was happening.
I woke up the next day in intensive care on a ventilator. Fortunately, God spared me from the memory of the ventilator because I am extremely claustrophobic. I apparently was very entertaining while in intensive care and drugged out of my mind. I kept trying to write notes to Christa and it was just squiggles on the board. It was frustrating for me and hilarious for her. I managed to recover quickly and was released from intensive care on Sunday. I had been admitted to the hospital due to cellulitis in my left lower leg so walking has become difficult. ICU thought I couldn’t ever walk I think, and they treated me like that. Once I got to the another hospital room I was bound to the bed. I was within feet of a beautiful bathroom and could not use it. Now that was pure torture. After about 24 hours they managed to get physical therapy down to see me and get me clear to go to the bathroom. I am happy to report that I am now walking with a walker and getting around pretty good in spite of the pain in my leg. Christa has to walk with me and hold me by a belt they put around my waist to insure that I do not fall.
All of the teams have cleared me to go home except the cardiac team. They are concerned that my heart was damaged during the event the week before since part of my heart is doing something at 10% less than before. I am preparing this morning to go in for a cardiac cath session to investigate my heart. I am a little apprehensive, but I have to remember to keep my eyes on Jesus. When I take them off of him I will slip beneath the waves. An exciting moment yesterday sent by God was a cardiac doctor who senses I was a little down and as we talked she asked if she could pray with us. God never fails to send me reminders that he is in control. Although I am in the middle of this journey I am reminded of a scripture in Ecclesiastes.
Ecclesiastes 3:1
In everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven.
Regardless of where I am today, God has ordained this time in my life for a purpose. I don’t know the full extent of that purpose but I do know that I am closer to God than ever before. On earth everything is balanced positive and negative. In order to enjoy God to the fullest in the good times, we must endure the bad times as well. The thing that is often overlooked however is that God is with us at all times, either good or bad.
I am watching the sunrise over Houston as I write this and it is absolutely beautiful. God is in the details, not just the big picture. Hug your family today life is short and can be gone in an instant.