Dawn went in to get her chemo administered yesterday and was told by the nurse that the doc wanted to meet with her. Dawn was under the impression that she wasn't going to see the doctor and she expressed this to the nurse, but the nurse said that the doctor needed to see her. The doctor went over Dawn's blood labs with her and let her know that her liver enzyme levels, which up until now have been pretty much perfect, have become elevated. There was one in particular that the doctor was concerned about and stated that there were two possibilities behind the elevation; either she had an infection, or one of her ducts were being blocked by a tumor. The doctor prescribed antibiotics for now, but will be keeping an eye on that particular level to see if the numbers change or not. Dawn also let the doctor know that she has set a goal to make it to my birthday in September. Dawn said that the doctor said that September is a good month for a birthday, but the look was more like, "we will try to get ya there".
Soooooo, not exactly exciting news. I asked Dawn last night how she was doing, and I asked her to be brutally honest. She told me that she felt rather numb, and honestly, I feel the same. There is almost a surrealness to this. Dawn and I find ourselves having conversations that we thought we wouldn't have to have for another 20 or 30 years. Dawn has been talking to our pastor and hospice to make sure things are in order and that in the case I have some issues, those issues will be taken care of. It just all seems to soon and so unfair.
One of my more regular prayers is that God would help me to have a Christian walk that would speak so much louder than my talk. And I believe that prayer has been answered. I find myself now asking God why this has to be the path that shows others our faith. This is a horrible path that we find ourselves traveling down. But Dawn and I know that God is still, and always has been, and always will be in control. He continues to carry us through this, and we continue to lean on Him and draw upon His strength. As tough as this is, we are at peace and we continue to press on.
Thank you for continuing to lift us up in prayer. It appears that our immediate future isn't so bright, but we know that God could still change that. Much love to all.