Want/need

What I want versus what I need.  There are a lot of things I want:  I want to have a partner to share my life with, own my own home/studio & gallery, not have to worry about money, be reconcilled with family/former friends, own property on an Island...

There is so much I could list & I think it is important to have a list, however, when I focus too much on what I want, it can become an unhealthy obssesion & I will not be able to appreciate what I do have.

In 2002 I was looking to buy a horse.  I had the space for it & the money to buy a horse with good breeding.  I did not find a horse I liked & instead I boarded 2 horses for the camp that is associated with the church I grew up with.  After a lot of work-clearing space for a corral, fixing the barn, building fences, buying food & supplies, the horses came.

Three days before they were due, my neighbour sent over a letter stating the by-laws of our area.  I fought back by going to the local municipal office with a petition & historical records (our barn had held dances & was a well known meeting places in years gone by).

Two months latter, the horses left & I was left feeling very upset.  But what if I had bought a horse?  They are not easy to sell.  

I did not get what I wanted for very long, yet, looking back I needed to have a purpose-by working on my dream of having a horse, I had 2 & did not have to worry about trying to sell 1.  It certainly took a long time for me to look at this event & see the value of the experience.

As I write about it today, I am able to look at it with a clearer perspective & that is something I aim to do in my life with all my wants & needs.

We need to love ourselves-We Are All Worth It!

God Bless

J Christian S