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Jessica Clarke - Journal

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Posted 2015-01-31T15:03:01Z

Jan 31

January is over. We made it through the month. There isn't much to report with my health. Nothing has really changed. I have good days and bad days when it comes to the anxiety about cancer. I am still seeing the therapist through the Cancer Patient Support Network every few weeks. The more I see her, the more I think she is a great fit for me. I find that I take something positive from every appointment that I have with her. Levi and I recently decided to cancel plans for our March trip to the west coast because it would have to be contingent upon a scan just prior to our departure date. It created too much pressure on that event. I am horrible at decision making. I second guess every choice. Kathy (above mentioned therapist) was able to help me to say, "We made the decision. We had good reasons to make it. Move on.". [...]

Posted 2015-01-09T01:00:00Z

Jan 8

I went against my own rule this morning and googled thymus regeneration. I found LOTS of really difficult to read medical papers and studies. One of those papers (which I was sort of able to comprehend) pointed me to this page. I found that it helped me to understand what may be going on with me. Although the initial paper referenced patients with Hodgkin's lymphoma, rather than NHL, I assume that the information translates. I'm not sure if this will help me to sleep at night... but it is good information with a positive NON CANCER explanation. Stay warm today wherever you are!![...]

Posted 2015-01-06T22:44:23Z

Jan 6

The words out of my doctor when he walked into the room were, "I think you're ok". This is what the takeaway should be for you after reading everything I will babble on about below.[...]

Posted 2015-01-05T15:58:12Z

Jan 5

Today I have a CT scan. This marks nearly 6 months since my last clean scan. That one was about 6 weeks after I stopped chemo. Im sitting at the Fanny sucking down 40 ounces of berry flavored barium. I'm praying, visualizing, practicing relaxation techniques and feeling ok. There is a little anxiety but we are managing it. Tomorrow at 3:00 I will get the results. I am looking forward to hearing the good news that I am still cancer free. The longer I go with no recurrence, the better my long term odds are. The green alien looking stuffed toy on my lap is a "healthy lymph node". Check them out at www.iheartguts.com