This post is going to be the most difficult to write; it will also be my final. I want to, again, thank each and every one of you for your love, prayers, flowers, cards, gifts, donations, food trains, vibes, and friendship. I have been wrapped in love from each of you and it has made this journey so much more bearable.
I was recently admitted to the hospital, for the second time, for not being able to eat, orally or through my feeding tube. After running some tests, they found fluid in my peritoneum (stomach area) that has tested positive for cancer cells. In addition to this, the cancer has made its way to my bowels, where it has decided to slow everything down to a crawl. This means I am able to take very little food in and am not able to get rid of it very easily.
In addition to the bowels, my kidneys have decided to join in the competition. One has decided to drop to 22% functionality and the other to 78%. The doctors have offered up stints to help this, but I have declined – by my calculations I have 1-full kidney and, hey, that’s more than a lot of people are operating with.
I have transitioned to in-home Hospice care this week and have been meeting with them to manage my nausea and pain. Once we get the medications worked out, I’m hoping to be a lot less groggy. I am still getting around pretty well, but tire out rather quickly with the lack of calories.
I want to send out a very special to thank my husband who has, wholeheartedly, taken on the not-so-fabulous job of being my primary caregiver. He has offered unyielding support – rubbed my stomach and back when I’m feeling sick, prepared special meals, brought me heat packs, held me as I’ve cried millions of tears and helped to reassure Bouden.
I’ve had a lot of questions about Bouden. We have been open and honest with him and have answered any questions he’s had. He seems to have a thorough understanding of the situation and is processing like the rest of us.
I’ve also received questions about flowers, gifts, etc.. In lieu, I ask that donations be made to the GoFundMe account to assist with medical bills. If anything is left over, it will be moved to Bouden’s college fund. Work friends can also make PTO donations. Additionally, I would love if you would share any fun memories in the comments below. Please just keep them PG or G-rated. :)
Again, thank you for all of the unyielding support throughout this journey. I could never have made it this far without my family and friends. As we move into this next chapter, I am comforted to know that I have you with me.
In love and gratitude,