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5/6/2015

I sit here staring at the calendar on the wall. All day long the phone has been ringing off the hook, one doctors office after another from Malia's Neurologist, oncologist, family doctor, Pediatric optomoligist, physical therapy, and the surgery center. Lets just say, our calendar is filling up fast! This is just part of our waiting game now I guess. Even with Malia's glasses on she is saying that she still cannot see, so I am hoping that at her appointment on Monday, they don't tell us that her eyesight is getting worse, because something as small as even a headache would make them open her back up to retrieve another biopsy. Its almost torture as a parent to have to wait for something else to happen to proceed with the next step, because I don't want anything else to have to happen to her. Her next MRI is on the 8th of next month, and her oncologist is wanting check her spine to make sure that there are no lesions growing in, or around her spine as well. I want to find a blank space on this calendar to just have a day to take my kids somewhere where they can run and play together, and just enjoy the sunshine with no worries. that is my goal for this month; make one special day for my kids to spend together.... I do have to say that this last couple of days has been pretty amazing without any problems. Malia has been so energetic, playing, running, and back to her old self. I just wish I could freeze time and stay right here for a while, I'm not saying forever, just long enough to feel like things were before, when worries were little, like what to make for dinner, or what bills need to be paid when. But that is just me being selfish! I am really thankful for this time that we do have, and I am defiantly not wasting a moment of it, and as long as my kids are smiling and happy, that is really all I can ask for.

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