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May 14th ... Another trip to the Doctors

We had another doctors appointment today with the kid's family doctor to check Malia's vitals for her next MRI. I am so proud of how far she has come, and how she can put a smile on everyone's face everywhere we go. Her personality has changed so much in opening up to people since all of this started happening. I am so grateful that her doctor truly loves her, and treats us like we are her family, Malia loves going to see her. We had to discuss about the on going episodes of shoulder pains, and now added on to everything else her sever headaches that she has been having for the last week. It seems like we have been in the ER at least once a week since we have been home from our last stay at the hospital because of her pain. But even the ER cant do much. Its sad when I feel safer being at the hospital sometimes because I cant take anything to unexpectedly happen to her at home. I have already had to watch her hang off the edge of life, and that is always in the back of my head freaking me out. Everyone always tells me how great we are handling all of this, but the truth is, I find myself avoiding people everywhere I go just so I don't have to talk about our situation out loud, and it is something I don't do on purpose. Beside talking to doctors, I think I have lost my social skills. I guess I have put myself in my own world, I know we are not going through this alone, but a lot of people don't understand how this all feels, and I don't expect anyone to even try. Malia's doctor told me today that I should look into a support group for parents who are going through situations like ours .... I don't know, now that I look at myself, maybe she is right!

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