here we go. i can't believe it's been 4 months already with this little guy in my life. what was life like before? who knows. it's been the greatest adventure of my life and I am hoping to honor Rhys by capturing his journey here as best as I can. he won't remember a single thing, that's what the nurses and doctors keep telling me. our PREOP was bitter sweet. I felt so at ease with the streamlining of the day's events, everyone was so competent, and yet, there was a glooming sadness over all of it. being on the patient end of things makes me very glad to have had the last decade on the other end. how do you grasp the thought that a man is going to open up your babies chest, poke a whole in his heart, intentionally, weave his fingers and instruments through some valves, shave excess muscle, and then sew a piece of his own heart covering where God made a narrowing? it's sci-fi stuff. all the while, knowing your baby is on a heart-lung bypass machine being controlled by a perfusionist. I love how perfusionist gets autocorrected to percussionist- because everything is riding on his ability to get set the rhythm of blood flow from and back to Rhys. the greatest lesson here is trust. I am trusting in the good Lord who brought this child and gave me a son, trusting in the stranger who will cradle him as he is placed under mask anesthesia, trust the hands of his surgeon to be steady and his mind clear, and trust in my son whose willful and happy spirit is already so bright at 4 months. trust and let go for he is in God's hand, the maker of him and the keeper of him.
When to be there
Start: Wed, Dec 02, 2015 @ 10:00 PM