Share. Connect. Love.

Posted 2020-01-11T15:42:00Z

1/11/20

I feel her but can’t see her. I have been trying to catch up on the things that were undone berween illness and our stolen mail for a month it is a significant setback. Yesterday driving in the mobility van to have long overdue issues resolved I had alone time on the road. I can’t say I liked it much. The time was needed to feel alone, but I can’t say that it was enjoyable, yet it was necessary. Niki and AJ spent the night Thursday night and we gathered and played dice with Cale, Ariana, Kathy, Garry, Margaret, and Nita. Having them all here helped. Niki was then off for school and AJ back to work at the Fire Dept Friday morning. (The City has been wonderful in allowing their grieving.) Thursday morning was oddly tense until AJ lightened our mood. Soon enough we were on our way to the lovely surroundings of the National Cemetery in Santa Nella. Jeff presented a nice story covering the twenty years he has known Tami and every one was encouraged to tell the person next to them a fond story of Tami. Steve sang a nice song, we spoke to one another a few minutes, we went up on the hill to observe, and “BAM” it was over (so fast). I felt sort of numb again. Everyone then left the wind and cold except AJ, Niki, Cale, Ariana, Kathy, myself, and Steve. We had to wait a little bit for them to finish the ground at her site. We paid our last respects and I said a prayer I had written in the middle of the night a couple of days earlier. It was okay to be thee and not mournfully difficult. It felt honorable. As we turned to go back to the limo we glanced at the names in the row immediately toward our car, as they had had their inscription complete given the time between interment and completion of that row, and what we noticed was that her neighbor was a Bronze Star recipient. Not a bad neighbor to have I would say. Not bad at all.

Ryne has been crying and can’t tell us why. I think I know, so we have upped the depth of our recent conversations. I hope it answers his questions even if it can’t sooth his heart.

Thanks Mo for everything. Your heart is no longer hidden. And yes I will sell it.

Thank you Sandy Henry and family for the great Chicken Dressing Bake. I had not only never had one, but had actually never even heard of one. 馃榿

Thank you to all of our dear friends who braved the wind and cold, and willingness to drive an hour plus to be with us in our time of sorrow, but also our time of remembrance of what her life reached for. She reached for truth, God, and family. She cherished love given and gave more in return. She ALWAYS reminded me I was cherished, and I will always cherish our time together and our love in return. 

F&P

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Comments (6)

  • Pam Brake
    Pam Brake

    Such a beautiful testimony to your love and marriage, family, and life. So much sorrow, yet so much hope for the future. Hugs are sent.

    8 months agoReply
  • Bev McCann
    Bev McCann

    That is so beautifully written mark. I continue to pray for you and hope to see you soon when I鈥檓 able to travel. Much love to you all.

    8 months agoReply
  • Vivian Cheeseman
    Vivian Cheeseman

    Thank-you for continuing to share, Dr. Spitzer. We continue our prayers for you all. I'm praying that Ryne will find his peace, and that he will continue to feel his mom's powerful love.

    8 months agoReply
  • Sheryl Garman
    Sheryl Garman

    Praying for strength and comfort for you and your family. You鈥檙e such a strong, inspirational person with unwavering faith. Thank you for the gifts you don鈥檛 even realize you鈥檙e giving.

    8 months agoReply
  • Carrie Bogue
    Carrie Bogue

    Tami left an imprint on our hearts, her gifts left behind her beautiful story is the future. My heart goes out to all the family but especially to Ryne. He has been so strong for so long . I pray his miracle comes soon .

    8 months agoReply
  • Dawn Stanley Johnston
    Dawn Stanley Johnston

    Dear Mark and Family, The forever of a family heart is eternal, this we know in Christ; our time on earth short and the wings on our sorrow release us in peace as we know, HE holds all that we love close to HIS heart supplying all who trust in him the eternal fountain of life. Amen. The LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD: but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake : and after the earthquake, a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice. 1 KINGS 19:11-12. KJV Shane, KEN and I hold all of you close in deep prayer, God鈥檚 eternal peace and love be with you, Dawn

    8 months agoReply