Why Does My Coffee Look Like Tea? The Theme Continues ~

Ok, so the coffee pot won. In times of peace I read the coffee pot manual, I fiddled with the coffee machine, putting the pieces where it seemed like they should go and looking back on how Gary would load and work the machine. When I was not feeling peace and was frazzled and frustrated, there were coffee beans on the floor and the counter, parts of the coffee machine all over and my coffee no matter what I did looked like tea....yuck.

When I think about my coffee pot during this experience it amazes me how much this experience represents the Christian struggle that can come with the stormy times in our lives.

There were times that I had peace, the peace that passes all understanding, there were times I was full of frustration, fear and doubt. But when I look back at each emotion, I realize deep in my heart that I believed if I behaved in a certain way then maybe , just maybe, things would turn out the way I wanted, Caleb and Cris Ann alive and home now. When I was peaceful and patiently putting each logistical piece together, studying the word and in silent prayer. I confess that just seemed right and that this would somehow fix everything. When I would scream out in terror, throwing any and everything in my way, crying and confused, I hoped that my expression of my pain would somehow also fix the situation. But neither did. Gods Will Be Done.

God remained God throughout this storm, his promises comforting , His Divine Will creating strength and His love for my family assuring.  Did I fix anything? No, my coffee looks like tea.

Today, I am beyond grateful that Caleb and Cris Ann are alive and Caleb has been released from the hospital and continues to heal physically and emotionally everyday. Gary reports that he loves our new daughter in-law, Cris Ann, and that he is grateful that she is part of our family and that Caleb has her in his life. Today, I am grateful that God is and has been providing for the financial needs of this journey, and I am grateful that my husband is a man of Godly strength and obedience. Today, the other part of me wants the kids to be on the plane with Gary on their way home, so that I can hug them both, seeing with my own eyes that my son and his wife are ok.

So what now? The News is that Caleb is out of the hospital and gaining strength everyday. Caleb and Cris Ann will remain in Manila together waiting for Cris Anne's visa to be issued. This can take weeks and or months. Gary is on a plane home as of today in an effort to save money.  Gary is heartbroken leaving the kids behind, but he has states, he believes that God is working all things together for good. We will continue to give thanks for Gods Mercy and Goodness to our family, we will pray for those who are less fortunate and we will continue to watch Caleb and Cris Ann's life together as we patiently wait on the Lord to show us his Will for them.

I know that no matter what I do and how badly I want something my way, my Lord and God, does what is best for all of us and for that I am grateful. I am grateful that God remains God so when I bump in to Him, or meet him in a quiet moment, I am assured and comforted by his merciful unending Love.

Posthope.org is an amazing website, I don't just say that because our oldest son, Paul Barton, created it and developed it after Caleb's motorcycle accident. But because this is the place that our family visits and revisits when we are in need of knowing we are not alone. I found that many times when I was alone and scared I would log on to posthope.org in hopes of reading a new post and when I found one I was always reassured and comforted. Caleb and Cris Anne have told me how much it has meant to read your notes of encouragement. I post this link to facebook but I ask that you share your remarks and encouragement on Posthope.org so that all of our praises and reports are in one location easily visited and assessable to all when Hope is needed. 

Thanks for hanging in there with me, this has been another life experience that has tested me and produced much faith. We could not have come this far without each and everyone of you.

I  am hoping I haven't broken the poor coffee pot!!!

Blessings and Love to each of you,

~ Dawn