Happiness

It has been an amazing couple of weeks. It is summer time and school is out. So Jr, the boy with one leg and no father, has been over here every day. He attended the last week of Bible classes and hangs out for hours with me and the guys. The other day when he was here, he got up to leave and as he got to the door, I went to grab his hand and give him a hug, which I always do, but he bursted into tears and fell on my shoulder. I was surprised, I had not seen Jr cry, very close the first few times we met, when he was in really bad shape, but never like this. He had been doing so well; I was thinking something must have happened. He lifted his head and looked me in the eyes and began to thank me. He really couldn't get much out besides, 'thank you so much, you are my bridge.' I am still not sure exactly what he meant, but I could tell the look on his face and the tears in his eyes were not sorrowful tears of hopelessness but thankful tears full of hope.

The graduation for the elementary school was this weekend as well. It was crazy because so many of the children I have spent the last three years with we're graduating. Jojo, one of sons of the blind widow had no one to go with him. Every child has a parent who escorts them. They walk the child to the stage, they put the ribbon and meddles around their neck and give support. Jojo has no one, his father is dead and his mother and brothers are blind. It would have been humiliating to have to go through that alone. So I escorted him to the graduation. As it began, they lined us all up, parents on one side and students on the other. All the parents grabbed the hands of their children and began to walk to the stage. I put my hand out for Jojo, because we were the only ones not holding hands, but he shook his head. I felt bad, he was uncomfortable and missed his dad and I understood. As we got closer to the stage I felt him tug on my shirt and there was his hand waiting for mine. I grabbed his hand and we walked on stage together and bowed in front of everyone. After the graduation I took him and a friend to get pizza and I bought him some cloths, since he has none, for his present. He was uncomfortable at first, but after the pizza, and two sodas, he began to walk tall. We had a blast! Jojo was playing and laughing with his friend, his mouth was on fire from the hot sauce his friend told him was not hot, and most of all, he forgot about the difficult life he lives; even if it was only a short time. We had a pizza left over and I got ice cream so he could take it home and celebrate with his mother and brothers.

The world's view of success is different from the Lord's view of success. I have had people say to me recently, 'we are so happy to hear you are doing so well.' They are right, I have never been better. I am happy, motivated, I get to happily serve the One I love with my whole life. I am going to get married to the perfect girl and I get to pour into the lives of those around me and watch the Lord transform lives. But is this success? Is this doing well? I own almost nothing, a computer and iPad. If I were to add up my possessions they would not be worth 1000 dollars. I have no job, no skill to help me get a job and I am disabled. I am not educated and have no degree from college. I am going on 31 years old with no possession, no career, no skill, no education, and no money. Success? In the eyes of the world I am a miserable failure. But I am happy, and it's a happiness that does not depend on any situation. My job is to eternally affect the lives around me and be used by the giver of life to extend life to those who have none. If I had a million dollars, a Doctorate from Yale, a prestige’s job and respect from the world, would I be happier? Absolutely not! None of those things that the world considers as successful will ever provide lasting happiness. The United States, the most successful Nation in history, we have been the mark for what successful is, but we have the number two highest depression rate in the world.

Jesus said, if you want to find your life then lose it. This is exactly the opposite of what the world says. I have found a lasting happiness in a restored relationship with the One who created me and that joy grows as I lose my life in the life of others. But the best part is, I have done nothing! The Lord died for me, the Lord suffered the wrath of God in my place. The Lord chose me (John 15:6), and gave me life because He is the only giver of life. The Lord delivered me from drugs, and gives motivation and a passion to serve Him every day. It is the Lord who hangs on to me, who directs my path, who affects the lives I come into contact with and He does all this despite my half hearted attempt at obedience. My greatest works are like a blood stained rag and not even worthy of the trash before the Lord. They are unacceptable apart from the mediation of the Lord, who has made me holy in His sight. Because I am made holy by the Lord, He accepts my half hearted attempt to offer my body as a living sacrifice and rewards me with life (Romans 12:1-2). I can boast of nothing and give thanks in everything, this is the Christian life.