managing symptoms, being with as much of it as I can, seeking "healthy indulgences"
I made it to my "Dancing with the Divine" class this morning -- had to drag myself out of bed, but enjoyed it, and it was good to connect with folks there. Then I did a little grocery shopping, which I usually enjoy, but it was pretty grueling because I was feeling queasy a lot of the time. Came home and had a coaching session with Suzanne, where she encouraged me to keep opening to all of what's here -- not just the good, inspiring stories, but all of it. And, she suggested a practice, with hand on heart, asking, "What's the most loving thing for me right now?"
I called the oncology nurse for advice about managing continued symptoms, and tried a few more things (e.g. letting ginger brew go flat -- pretty good, actually). Then took a nap, and ate a little, and watched two good movies with Don, who's sick with a cold -- The Book of Kells and Garden State. Both of them, coincidentally, were about living life fully despite the pain and fear involved.
I'm actually feeling relatively okay right now... hoping it lasts, but not counting on it.
I'm collecting recommendations for good movies, TV shows, books, and "healthy indulgences" like herbal baths, guided meditations, favorite relaxing music... so send them my way. Thanks!
Comments (7)
These updates are so great thank you. I've been enjoying a Danish show called Rita. It's well done and funny becsuse of the dysfunction but not uplifting by any means. She's wuite a character. 2 seasons on Netflix. We are heading out of town for spring break. I will continue to send you loving kindness and good healing energy. Your strength and calm is inspirational. Much love, KC
Dear Becca, Thank you for your continued sharing. A favorite movie: Babette's Feast Check out this video or Judy Collins in concert. She only gets better! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=onKhceL303M A big hug! Tom
Hi Becca, I love the music of Kevin Kern and use it in my meditation class at Oakwood and with the kids at Waisman. I find it to be so soothing. I also appreciate the inspired music of Eve Kodiak. Her web address is evekodiak.com. I often listen to Meditations for a New Year's Day. It's beautiful. Not sure what your taste in T.V. or film is, but for something funny and creative, I so enjoyed the show, Flight of the Concords, about two singers from New Zealand who live in New York and experience some humorous adventures. I think it was on public television or a cable station and is likely available on netflix. I am thinking of you each day. Your posts are also helpful to read and I appreciate your sharing this journey with us. I am going in for a hopefully, minor surgery on Monday and you are giving me strength. Love, Gerri
Becca, in the realm of good books – I read a lot, and there are a lot of books I like. I don't know your reading tastes or what you're looking for right now, but here are a few suggestions of mostly less well-known books that I read and loved over the past few years. I intentionally did not name books you probably already know about – except for the last one on my list. The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating, by Elisabeth Tova Bailey – a short memoir of illness that includes a lot of natural history about snails. When We Were the Kennedys, Monica Wood – beautifully written memoir of a working-class Catholic childhood. It had me crying by page 3 or 4. What the Living Do, Marie Howe – a powerful book of poetry. Dirt Farmer, Kristin Kimball – lovely memoir of a woman who falls in love with a farm and a farmer. Teach Us to Sit Still, Tim Parks – often funny memoir of an uptight skeptic who learns to meditate and stop gnashing his teeth so hard. The Great Work of Your Life, Steven Cope – an amazing book that uses the Bhagavad-Gita as a kind of guide to exploring ideas about how people find right vocation, with short, fascinating biographies of 11 notable people – Beethoven, Harriet Tubman, Gandhi, Jane Goodall, Walt Whitman, Susan B Anthony, etc. – to illustrate the book's ideas. Monkey Mind: a Memoir of Anxiety, Daniel Smith – hilarious and also instructive. A Marker to Measure Drift, Alexander Maksik – very powerful and little-known novel that I can't tell you about because it's best read with no prior knowledge of the plot. The Body Keeps the Score, Bessel Van der Kolk – a psychotherapist eloquently explains trauma and ways of healing, calling on his years of working with Vietnam vets and others. This excellent book integrates the latest findings in neuroscience. Driving the Saudis, Jayne Amelia Larson – in a somewhat lighter and less literary vein, a memoir by a woman who worked as a chauffeur for Saudi princesses visiting LA. Mind-boggling but true. Wild, Cheryl Strayed – occasionally bestsellers are wonderful books. Like this one. Happy reading, whether you check out any of these or not.
Hi Becca, I'm glad to hear you liked Garden State! I'll have to check out the Kells movie. That's cool that they happened to have similar themes. I'm sorry to hear about the queasiness/nausea but glad to hear that you made it to dance class! Heck yeah for making it through the week after your first chemo treatment! :) I'll think about other book/show/movie suggestions. Looking forward to seeing you soon! Elizabeth
Dear one, how great to elicit suggestions - and I'm noting them myself! See how the ripples of asking for help creates so much MORE helpfulness for many! A couple non-traumatizing, dear movies I've enjoyed are Local Hero (old one, quirky, fun) and the more recent Intouchables. I was also touched/uplifted by The Way, Way Back (hang in there with it). Sending healing Vib-a-RATIONS! : )
Becca: You are amazing & inspiring to us in your dance with cancer. I just got caught up on your story tonight. Sending you and Don much love and metta to carry you through this difficult time. Music has always been a healing choice for me. Here's an album you may enjoy: Selwa by Choying Drolma & Steve Tibbetts. Choying is a Tibetan nun & sings very beautifully. I will think on some good movies & books for the future, but for now, PBS is my channel of choice. Calling the Midwife is a wonderful show, they just started a new season on Sunday. Hugs & deep love to you!