One week home

It’s Saturday today, at least I think so. I haven’t quite been aware of the day of the week for a while. Kira informed me that today is also July, a fact I was totally unaware of. But all those facts means we’ve been home for one week! We’ve made some huge progress in the last week. Least of all eliminating the suitcases from the ground cover of our home. The suitcase clutter has been replaced by toys that Evelyn insists be on the floor. I appreciate her value of clear, clean surfaces, but I also look forward to the day she learns how to pick things up. 

Evelyn has been very comfortable in our home, playing with everything she can access and embracing new experiences without trepidation. We filled a kiddie pool yesterday for the girls and added some ball pit balls and it was a big YES from Evelyn. She splashed and splashed and acted so boldly that I couldn’t sit and had to be ready at any moment to grab her and sit her back up because she would stick her whole head underwater. It was just a few inches deep, but enough to keep me on my toes. We hope this means lake days are still in store for us this summer.

Evelyn is still a daddy’s girl, but is loads more comfortable with me than she was a week ago. I tucked her in the Ergo to clean up a bit and with her blankie on her lip, she relaxed and fell asleep. It is not nap time. I don’t know what this means for nap time, but considering that jet leg is most certainly still a factor, I’m letting her sleep. It’s awfully cozy too. We are so grateful for the progress that’s been made in her attachment to me since eventually Dave will have to go back to work. 

Kira and Evelyn are learning how to get along as sisters. Kira is eager for hugs, kisses, and matching outfits and has also mastered making the word “stop” into four syllables while wrapping protective arms around anything she considers precious at the time. 

We still have a lot to learn about each other. For instance, what is a normal nap time like? A jet lagged nap time was 3 1/2 hours on Monday. Yesterday it was one hour. Mom and Dad did not find one hour sufficient, so we rocked and held her to coax her back to sleep. We were unsuccessful but whether it’s will or jet lag, she will learn her mother’s will is as strong as her coffee and there will be a reasonable nap time in this house. We are also still learning about her food likes, which still pretty much remains anything Indian, although we did successfully serve scrambled eggs for breakfast. Other than that she’s had two kinds of dal, a chick pea curry, and lemon rice for breakfast. This child’s tastes make me think that maybe we don’t give kids enough credit for what we think they would like. Maybe picky eaters are bored eaters and they need a little ginger, garlic, and mustard seed to start their morning. 

For the next days and weeks we will continue to stick together as a family and teach Evelyn was a family is. Dave and I are taking turns rocking her to sleep for nap and bed time. At two years old when you might start to do less rocking and consoling to sleep, we are committing extra time to this. One book I read recently reminded us that for a newborn infant the fluid in their inner ear moves every time they get picked up, helping to develop the vestibular system which processes sensory input. A neglected child or a child in institutional care who likely got held much less often than a baby in a family will have an underdeveloped sensory system. When they get older this can be the cause of behavioral problems because the child can’t, for instance, distinguish the difference between a touch that is kind and one that means danger. So we will rock and rock Evelyn and in doing so, catch up her system to process sensory input in a healthy way. At night we are taking turns sleeping in her room for the first month, so that if she stirs or cries in the night she learns that she can express her needs and that her needs will be met. This also reduces her fear of this new place to know she is not left alone. 

Thank you for your care and prayers for us. The meal train is rolling and is going to quickly undo any weight I lost while my system was upset in India. We are so grateful for everything that has been done on our behalf. Being in ministry can be hard because you can see the worst of people, but there are such encouraging rewards when you also see the very best and most generous moments that people have to share. We are blessed to have such a faithful and caring congregation and community around us. Praise God!