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Posted 2019-06-05T02:49:00Z

May 2019

I can't sleep.
So I'm researching public records of the congenital heart surgery database (I know, I know). This feels like it gives me a tiny semblance of control over a situation that is absolutely and completely out of my jurisdiction.
My fears have been tangible this week. I can feel them resting heavily in the back of my throat and, every time I eat, squeezing my middle like a lead vest. Uncomfortable and all too familiar- it makes me want to barf.[...]