“Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." Mike Tyson
You are never ready. You may think you are ready, but loss has a way of redirecting your thoughts and emotions. It’s like you planned a trip, but Waze has decided to take you a different way; one you hadn’t planned. You get to the same place, but not how you thought you would or in the same amount of time.
When we brought Phyllis home on Sunday we knew that this would be her last stop; her last run up Cherry Hill Road, the last time she slept in our home and the last time we would be together as a family of five. Yet when she slipped peacefully out of this world in the early morning of March 25th we found ourselves surprised by the suddenness and ill prepared for the floodgates of emotions. We are walking the tightrope of remembering what we loved about Phyllis as well as those things that just made us shake our heads.
There is nothing we would like more than to celebrate Phyllis’s life with her friends, but truthfully, we are not ready. We have decided that her funeral will be graveside with just Phyllis’s immediate family. There will be a livestream and we will share that link when we get it. Our plan is to do something (post-COVID) to celebrate her life; something she would like.
In the meantime, please continue to post and share stories. While we won’t be reading them aloud to Phyllis, we will share them with each other. The thread of friendship, loyalty, and love that runs through each post and comment, fills our hearts with gratitude.
If you would like to make a donation in Phyllis’s memory, we have listed 3 of her many favorite funds/charities below:
Marchand Espir Family Holocaust Education Fund
(Holocaust education programs to ensure that the events of the Holocaust will not be forgotten or repeated)
Marchand Espir Family Holocaust Education Fund
D&R Greeenway
(Preserve and care for land and inspire a conservation ethic)
Homefront
(Help to end homelessness in central New Jersey)
Thank you for your continued love and support.
Sy, Michael, Deborah and Sarah
Comments (6)
Tonight there will be another star in the sky burning brighter than all the rest. Our deepest sympathy for your loss. ~Sandy, Steve, Ryan and Katie O'Connor
Rest In Peace Phyllis. A light has gone out in so many lives with your passing, and of course in Princeton too! Your town! Reading all the incredible comments your friends have made has only served to deepen the respect I have always held for you. And we had fun together! You made a delicious curry for Zaki’s birthday. Candace, you and I went to New Hope to see that crazy Elvis play... and we saw each other at bridge. We had our times of ‘preaching to the choir’ on political issues, because we were so on the same page. But there was so much more to you and your contribution to the lives and livelihood of so many, it is humbling to read theses comments from your friends. Our hearts go out to Sy and your children - you lead a phenomenal life, gave a phenomenal amount of energy to so many causes, we are fulfilled by the fact that we had the chance to know you during our years in Princeton. Thank you for letting us call you a friend.
No one is ever ready to see a loved one leave your presence even though you've watched Phyllis slip away these last few days. From my own experience of losing Irv, it is still a shock when a last breath is taken. Just take one day at a time at your own pace. There will always be a gap but the many happy memories of your lives together will be a source of comfort. My condolences to all of you at this difficult time. Warmly, Sandie
Thinking of you all during this very difficult and painful time. Nothing truly prepares for the loss of someone so wonderful. I have been moved to tears every single day reading the lovely words that EVERYONE has shared. She was truly amazing and an inspiration. Wishing you peace, comfort and that you feel all of your feelings as you grieve and cope. Sending so much love and positive energy. May the memories of Phyllis bring you comfort and joy. She will be in my heart!
Thank you for sharing the link of Estelle’s interview with Phyllis. Her questions were wonderful and hearing Phyllis’s answers was so cathartic! Like so many, I will forever be grateful for my friendship with Phyllis and the positive impact she created in our sweet town.
It’s inconceivable that Phyllis will not be running a marathon, a campaign, or an effort to improve her community. She was the embodiment of public service and she was a household name when I was growing up. Only later through my being a local reporter did I fully appreciate her commitment to her community and her deep, knowledge of local government. She inspired everyone who met her through her passion, humor, and bottomless well of energy. We’ll miss Phyllis so much but I can’t even count how many ways she will live on through the ways she influenced people, including me. We were so lucky to know her. Much love to the whole family.