Language Lessons

How do you say "need" in German? As in, "I need more verbs in my German vocabulary." 

I had a great language lesson today as my two favorite nurses taught me loads of action words. I had just spent a record twenty-three minutes on the Lokomat bearing fifty kilos of my own weight as I worked with the machine to push my body up and engage the quadricep and knee muscles in their simplest actions. Physically exhausted from the therapy, I asked to be put in bed for a couple hours. My nurses changed the sheets and gave me a rapid fire list of new German words while testing which ones I already knew. The mental exhaustion kicked in the minute they left me alone.

I've worked hard this week - physically and mentally - and I'm thankful for the upcoming weekend with no scheduled activities. I'm celebrating the improvements I've made this week - taking a few more steps, more time in the Lokomat, and a few new vocabulary words. They are relatively small accomplishments, but something significant I've learned here is that progress is relative. Two patients have been here three months and are both walking around (a little unsteadily) while another patient who has been here six months remains wheelchair bound. My end result of rehab is still unknown. I'm hopeful for a full recovery, and I post the progress and healing here so you can pray with me and be encouraged, but please don't mistake my optimism for ignorance of my condition or premature complete recovery.

I like to think myself articulate in English, but how does one adequately convey the joy found in God that exists simultaneously with the agony of being so physically broken? My faith in God is unshaken by the lack of leg use, but don't think that doesn't make me frustrated at times that I can't use my legs - or other critical body parts below my waist. I can be excited and ask you to celebrate with me when I do take one or two steps because that is a huge accomplishment for someone who was told by the surgeon that my post-operation prognosis was a 1% chance of ever walking again. One step for me is a huge accomplishment in the face of that kind of prognosis, however, that does not guarantee a full recovery. 

There's still a lot of hard work and healing left to happen if I'm ever going to walk again. In the midst of that, I choose to laugh. I have a great sense of humor. I inherited it from my dad and grandpa; I developed it through APUSH with Mr. Felton (joke's on you if you though we were learning history - and I still got college credit for that test). I'd like people to laugh with me, but I recognize some of my friends are struggling with understanding what God is doing (just as I am) though they process it differently than I do. I'm not going to force anyone to laugh. It's a language lesson for me as I learn to be sensitive to others, and beg of you to do the same. Don't make me cry just because you're crying, and don't ask my friends to be happy just because one of my favorite Canadians sent me a hilarious fart joke on Facebook (thanks a load, Britt).

The German language approaches things differently than the English language does. I have to humble myself a great deal to reconstruct meaning in new ways as I learn German just as I have to humble myself to express myself both honestly and respectfully to others who process emotions differently than I do. 

I know I don't normally use this site for this kind of introspection and exhortation, but I felt a little convicted through different conversations I had or heard about this week. I promise I won't make it regular - more Carly Rae and robots next week.