No Plan B

I'm stubborn.

You may have figured that out even if you haven't met me yet, but I'm a particularly determined girl. My mother frequently joked that if I was a first born, I'd be an only child because I had such a wildly independent spirit that would not easily bend. My stubbornness is what helped me get to Germany in the first place, and I'll make it through because my stubbornness won't go away.

I have been asked several times why I didn't go back to America after my accident, and honestly, the idea never crossed my mind. I felt called to Germany, and the accident didn't change my sense that I was supposed to be teaching these incredible students at Black Forest Academy. When I was raising support, a couple people asked me what was my "Plan B" if I didn't get enough support to go to Germany. I told them it was Guatemala, but I never for a moment truly doubted I'd get to Germany. There was no Plan B; I was supposed to be in Germany.

The feeling stayed the same since I arrived. I'm supposed to be here. Teaching at BFA is better than my dream job (most of you know my dream job was teaching at the school I graduated from - this is beyond better for me). As I told one of my coworkers after she asked if I planned to come back, it's going to take more than paralysis to keep me from my amazing students at BFA. There's a lot of details to still fall into place, so I'm praying things come together quickly to give me peace of mind as I continue to settle in.

Ultimately, though, I'm not worried because I have the peace that passes understanding - I'm supposed to be here. I can't wait to get back to my classroom to teach my wonderful students. Today I practiced walking to school with my dad wheeling my chair beside me. I made it halfway the first time, and, stubborn child that I am, made it two-thirds the second attempt later in the day. Wheeling to school is a breeze - there's a slight incline all the way there; I just roll right down, but I'm not about the easy way out. If I took the easy way out, I'd never have left America. I'd still be skating by in suburbia in a boring, less than awesome life. 

Instead, I chose to make hard choices and end up in Germany. Now, I'm still stubborn and refusing the easy route because in my current situation, the easy route might lead to loss of muscle power. I chose to practice brushing my teeth standing up in REHAB even though it was easier sitting in the chair because I don't want to be satisfied with the chair. I chose to walk as far as I could to school this morning because I don't want to be satisfied with easy. I chose to follow Jesus because I don't want to be satisfied with less than the best for my life.

I have no regrets with that decision.

That doesn't mean I don't have stresses, so I'd love your prayers and positive thoughts as I navigate the transition from Swiss medical care to German. I've got to get a German prescription for physical therapy tomorrow morning - please pray it goes seamlessly before I return to my German physical therapist Tuesday. She seems like a great therapist who comes highly recommended by Andy at REHAB, and while I don't have the rapport with her that I've built with Alex, Iris told me that she might let me ride the horses - Alex wouldn't because she doesn't like horses (and there were other more pertinent exercises to work on while I was at REHAB like the nightmare wheelchair handling up and down stairs). This is also another great opportunity to work on my German since Iris is not fluent in English - apparently only Swiss PTs have to be. Fortunately, I've got some German medical vocabulary built up from my five months at REHAB; unfortunately, I don't know which words are high German and which are Swiss German... 

But, hey, there's no Plan B. This is happening; I'm not running away from it just because it's difficult. As Augustus Waters says, "I'm on a roller coaster that's only going up, my friend."