6/28/16. CT scan results

It's taking everything in me to type right now, but many have inquired about the CT scan we had yesterday, and we certainly appreciate the support and prayers.

The oncologist called herself today, and unfortunately, it was not a good call. She said that the CT scan showed things "are significantly worse, and very bad." The largest tumor near or in his right lung is bigger, and things have spread. There are clear solid tumors not just in the lower lobe, but now the upper lobe of the right lung where there wasn't before, and now it has also moved to the left lung. Additionally, there is more around the diaphragm and liver area.

As I previously shared, the surgeon did NOT want to do surgery anytime in the near future as it's too risky, and inflammation takes at least 6-8 weeks to start to calm down. However, the oncologist does not feel we have that much time and we need to move quicker. And, she is very concerned it's cancer. Yes, the one word we've been dreading.

She cannot diagnose cancer from a CT scan which is why she needs the surgeons. They need to look at the scan together and determine which tumor is the safest, if we have to pick, to try to get enough out for diagnoses. And how quickly we can do it, since waiting isn't really an option. She said we have to get part of a tumor to diagnose and give it a name, because if it is cancer, they need to know which family so they can plan appropriate treatment.

Going in and taking it all out is not on the table..too dangerous right now. She said she asked the surgeon if he feels at this point they would have to remove the entire lung and he said he doesn't think so, but that is still a possibility of course because we don't know exactly where all it is. Would he have to remove the lower lobe of the lung? Most likely. None of which we needed to hear.. But worse case (hopefully worst case) he could lose his entire right lung, but can survive on one lung, he just "wouldn't be a professional athlete." Any of us that know Cole know that isn't a random statement for this kid... Don't even get me started on talking about the possibility of him losing the very thing he's most passionate about, playing sports..

Yes, his doctor is still consulting with St. Jude's, but they are behind on their cases. She is very persistent, which we have appreciated, and she isn't trying to waste any more time, or wait longer than we need for things to happen. So she's talking to them again and pressing. Should Children's Mercy not be able to diagnose, or not be able to perform any necessary surgeries, she plans to send us to another cancer center such as St. Jude's, if an option, maybe KU, or most likely to Mayo. At the end of the day, we are ALL on the same page that we will treat Cole where ever is the BEST place to fix him. End of story. We still feel confident about his current oncologist and believe she is pursing the best possible plan for Cole, wherever that ends up being.

There are probably a few more details I'm leaving out from the conversation, but right now I'm just feeling numb about things and am exhausted. I honestly can't even register that this is happening to my baby and this conversation happened today. If I let myself stop and really think right now, I'll start crying again. I am a strong person, but right now, I just want to melt. However, fighting is the ONLY option so where ever our path is going, we will FIGHT and I/we will be ready. No other choice, so I say, LET'S GO. I believe in my heart that Cole will be treated and healed..and IF this is cancer, it is curable and he will be ok. That's all I can believe right now.

Continued thoughts and prayers are appreciated, and we are grateful for the tremendous amount of support we are receiving. Bless all of you.