Journal Posting Under The Influence of Chocolate |11-1-16|

Mike has been feeling stronger and stronger this past month. So far, he's felt better at 43 than he did at 42. That will soon change, but for now, he's feeling good. I've been pretty happy and content, myself. I have been feeling confident that the Brentuximab is working because of how Mike has been feeling. It's hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that he's going to go from seeming like his old self, back to being at the bottom, feeling terrible. But like everything, things go up and down. We've definitely learned that in this past year. There is always a good to the bad, and a down to the up.

Mike had a CT scan on Monday, and I have to say, I was surprised when they called to tell him that there was only a slight improvement. I truly felt like he was almost, if not completely in remission. The doctor was still happy with the progress, and I'm trying to remain grateful that it has not grown. I'm also holding out a little hope that the PET scan he has on the 17th will show more significant progress. The mass in the center of his chest went from 6.0cmx2.2cm down to 5.9cmx1.9.

If you were to just guess his status based on how ornery he is at the doctor's office, then I bet you'd guess that the cancer was gone, too! He gave them all a hard time last week that no one called him after the chemical explosion in Atchison the week before. He pouted to them that no one really cared about them, and on and on. They are always good sports and laugh at the appropriate times. It makes him feel better...and yet, encourages him. He was also complaining to Dr. Shune that he is gaining weight and she told him, "Don't worry, we want to fatten you up before we put you on the transplant diet." Sounds delicious. Good thing we have 37pounds of Halloween candy sitting around here.

Last Wednesday he had a lumbar puncture (spinal tap) done to make sure there are no signs of cancer in his spinal fluid. Dr. Ganguly said that they've had a couple patients where there was no reason to believe they did, but then after transplant, they relapsed very quickly due to the cancer being in the spinal fluid. We felt pretty confident there wasn't, again, due to the fact that he feels so good, but you never know.

On Thursday, the day after the Lumbar Puncture, Leslie, one of our favorite RN's, (meaning: she gets a lot of crap given to her from Mike) called. When Mike answered she said, "Well, I have some bad news." Mike said he thought he was going to have a heart attack. He said, "There's cancer in my spinal fluid." Leslie felt terrible! "OH MY GOSH, NO! I WASN'T EVEN THINKING ABOUT YOUR TEST YESTERDAY. I'M SO SORRY!" She was calling him just to say that he wasn't going to have an office visit after his CT on Monday. .... Breathe, Mike. Of course Mike gave her a hard time for that one. Note to all medical persons when talking to a cancer patient: do not start your conversation with, "I have bad news." They will immediately assume you are going to tell them they are going to drop dead that instant.

On that note of what not to says... if you are my kid's teacher, please don't call and start with "I have bad news." I will immediately assume my kid started using (and taught other, more innocent children) some of the not so polite language they have possibly (probably) (ok, definitely) heard their parents use from time to time. whoops.( working on that.)

So anyways, the LP went fine, and now that Mike thinks he has officially been through almost everything I have been through with childbirth (Oh please...)... he is back to feeling like himself.

We went to visit my Dad, Aunt Rose, and grandparents in Summerfield this past weekend. It was great to see them, as always. The kids wore their Halloween costumes so they could trick or treat. They also played in the leaves, went on a Kubota ride, ate pizza, and visited. We aren't very good at scheduling our trips up there, because we ran out of time before we could make it to see my Grandma Bernasek and Grandma and Grandpa Henry. We'll be back up that way this weekend again. We stopped at my Mom & Allen's house on the way home and the girls had a fun time painting Grandpa Allen's face!

Monday night we took them trick or treating and they loved it. Reid got the hang of it pretty quick! Molly was a greek goddess, Lucy was a vampire one day, and a princess the next, and Reid was a police officer. I thought they looked pretty cute! Today is the real holiday for me though: Eat All of Their Candy Day.

So here we are, on November first, knee deep in Reese's, and I'm thinking about how this month is going to FLY by. Mike is still on schedule to go into the hospital on Saturday, the 26th. When we talk about him coming home in March, that seems like sooo far away. But let's not think about that. Let's focus on how awesome it is to have my whole family together, happy, healthy,(well, pretty much) and more appreciative of each other than we've ever been before.

Ok, I better go... I wish Reid would stop trying to catch me sneaking candy and eat a healthy, well balanced lunch. That's the example I set around here. Or not.

XO

Robin