Bracing for Re-Entry
I didn't realize moving back into the mainstream of life would be quite this difficult. The good news is that before leaving Houston I was given the green light to drive so I was able to drive the 4 1/2 hours to the Hill Country and then the 4 1/2 hours two days later to Lubbock. It was exhausting, of course, but not unbearable. It helps to have a car that virtually drives itself and, as Claudia has stated, is like driving a couch.
I had planned to go back to work for a few hours on Monday but was not able to do so. On Tuesday I went in to a clean office (thanks to the Rawls staff for arranging that), a bouquet of beautiful flowers (thanks to my supportive department), and many friendly faces I hadn't seen in months. By the end of the day, although energetic, I was exhausted. It seems I'm having some trouble accepting that I'm just not full of the energy that I was between the surgery and mid-treatment when the fatigue set in. Patience has never been my strong suit and waiting to get my energy back is frustrating. Obviously my congestion and cough (which also affects my sleep) is making things worse so I can't wait to get over that. I hear that with time there will be less fatigue, but I think in the meantime I'm going to need much more caffeine and rest and perhaps someone to wait on me. Jason seems to be doing a fine job at the moment even if it feels like hovering at times!
The good news is that lying in bed has enabled me to catch up on General Hospital (yes, this is my bubblegum television), email, and blog updates. The next big project is finally getting unpacked from our 3 month brain tumor vacation. So, everyone be patient with me while I get settled in and continue to train for competitive napping. If anyone wants to train with me or just serve as a "domestique," please let me know!
Comments (7)
Sleep on!
I'm joining you in training, just from a distance. And I have a training partner who insists on taking her naps on me. ;) Seriously though, glad you are home and settling in.
“Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love – for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you from misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. *Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.* You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.” ― Max Ehrmann, Desiderata: A Poem for a Way of Life
Don't force yourself to do anything. Continue to listen to your body. You're on the right track, just in getting back home and allowing yourself to adjust and then rest.
I believe rest is the only thing you should worry about at this time. I can not wait! to see you in a week or so! We love you so much.
Energy will come--especially with enough naps!
GH? Another crazy thing we have in common. Me - since, well, forever. We will have to catch up on that together. And much else. :)