A New Year. Not looking ahead.

Originally posted: January 1, 2016

Today was a day where we were able to stay home. Do nothing. To just be together. Even when you are trying to not think about the cancer living in your home, in the center of your son's head, it is always there. As we start the new year, I have deliberately not thought about what the year holds. Yes, the thoughts have tried to creep in.

I think, for me, I have to take it one day at a time. Just like early on when Derek had his first surgery to place the drain, I couldn't even think about the craniotomy. I had to live in the present and just work on the now.

Same thing applies now. I cannot think ahead as I don't know, nor can I control, change, or fix any of it. No, it is not living in denial. When there are decisions to be made we will face them when we have information to make decisions about them. We will take it as it comes and we will press on as a united front. I could not do this without my best friend. I couldn't go though this without him.

So as far as new year's resolutions go, I will just resolve to try to do better at being patient, being content and showing joy. I have an amazing example to watch in Derek who, I just can't say it enough, is taking this fight on like a champ. I did some looking back at old pictures. Derek really has always been a smiley, happy, sweet, genuine, caring, encouraging, smart, special boy from day one. Thank you all for walking this journey with us.

Thank you for the comments and support. We appreciate you all.