It has been three weeks since Derek went to be with the Lord. And it has been a mix of emotion. Some days are easier than others.
I want to say thank you to everyone who made Derek's funeral a memorable weekend.
I have to make a confession. When Derek was first diagnosed with his brain cancer, we were told that children who had this type of cancer rarely survive longer than 24 months after the cancer is found. I had the thought, who would be at his funeral? Like a fool, I thought he did not have that much time to establish relationships with many people who knew him. I thought the funeral would be a small group of close friends and family.
Well, I am not ashamed to admit that I was absolutely and totally wrong with all of my assumptions. The number of people that came out to support Derek and my family was more than I could have ever imagined. I was told that the funeral home ran out of chairs and it was standing room only. And that does not even take into consideration all the people who came to support Derek the day before the funeral at the visitation. The amount of support for Derek humbled me greatly. I cannot thank everyone enough who supported Derek.
There is no way getting around it, there are definitely sad days for me. I mean one fourth (1/4) of my family is gone, but as the Lord has shown me throughout all of this, just trust Him. He will provide. Although through my narrow human vision, I don't yet know what those provisions might be. But like the Bible says, the Lord will provide. And He has. Before Derek's cancer, I would have told you I knew what that meant. But I have lived it on a whole new level. I have learned to just trust. Derek has given me assurances that there is a powerful good.
Going forward will be a very different version of how I saw my family's future. All my planning was for four. What parent would not assume that they would get to see all their children grow up? I have been telling people that we never intended for Derek to be an only child. There was always a small chance that Derek could have been an only child but Angela and I always planned on having more than one child. But never once did it ever occur to us that Kate would be an only child. Kate is a wonderful person and we now have new challenges that we never saw coming. But our new reality is set. Please keep us in your prayers.
That is all for now,