F-A-T-I-G-U-E

Today marks the halfway point of my radiation treatments.  That's about how much hair I have left on my head, too - HALF.  

Everyone you talk to who has ever had radiation, or any doctor, will tell you the FATIGUE that sets in.  But honestly, nothing can prepare you for how it really feels.  Being TIRED is one thing. Being tired because you had a busy day. Or being tired because you didn't get a chance to take a few minutes for yourself.  But being fatigued from radiation takes it to a WHOLE NEW LEVEL.*  Just trying to walk - putting one foot in front of the other - is exhausting.  I have heard people talk about the fatigue over and over and over, but I never really knew what it meant until now.  The fatigue that I am feeling is darn near indescribable.  I feel like I could take a nap for 2 weeks.  And being so tired makes the things I want to say not come out quite right.  It is affecting my thinking and my speech.  I know what I want to say, but it just doesn't come out quite right. My thoughts are all foggy, but I am sure it is just fatigue.  

Since the fatigue has hit me like a ton of bricks, I am going to lower my physical therapy days from 3 to 2.**  When I am there all I think about is curling up in my bed and taking a nap.  I am going to continue to do physical therapy because I want to get stronger.  I can't give up - I just have to keep moving forward.

So I finally got to bring Tate home.  He had been staying with my good friend Kristi for a couple of months.  I was so excited to bring him home!  It seems like he and I picked up right where we left off - that made me very happy.  He has settled in real well.  I am sure he misses the 2 female golden retrievers that he was around for 2 months, and I am sure they miss him.  They will have to get together for some play dates.  Kristi had Tate at a very crucial time - when he was potty training and learning all kinds of puppy tricks.  She and her husband Doug did an excellent job of training him.  If Tate ever needs a home, I know where to find a good one.  

I am still enjoying lunch dates with old friends (and new friends) and meeting up and visiting and catching up.  And I still love getting cards and visits when people come out to the house.  Lots of people have brought great dinners.  THANKS.  I will write more another night when I am not so tired.  Goodnight.

I CAN:

- take a nap anytime of the day I want

- understand know what real fatigue is

- (I am capable of) taking care of Tate (with a little bit of help)

(she started snoring before we could get to the "I CAN'T"s, and that is fine with me...)

* Annette's sister Susan here - I am typing as she composes this blog.  She keeps falling asleep and I wake her up to see if she is finished writing.  :)

** Susan here again - Annette said they were lowering her therapy days due to fatigue, but they were talking about cutting a day off before she got tired!  She is meeting all of her physical therapy goals, so they are cutting back on hours.