The End of Round 2

As I typed out the title of this post I stopped to let it sink in. Is that it? We've only been through 2 rounds? I feel like this has been our life for so much longer than that.

The past week was pretty good. The weather has been nice and Mike has been feeling "ok." He hasn't felt as good as he did during week 3 of the 1st round, but he hasn't necessarily been sick, either. He just says, "I just don't have as much energy going into Round 3 as I did going into Round 2." He was able to spend a little time outside some of the days, but he gets pretty tired really quickly. Saturday we went to the St. Patty's Day Parade in town and although he LOVED being out of the house, he was wiped out when we got home. Standing for an hour or longer in drizzly weather wasn't his ideal day.

Thursday he made it to watch the girls at swimming lessons. Lucy blurted out, so matter of fact, to her instructor, "My dad has cancer!" Our faces turned red, and reassured Ms. Becky that it's going to be ok. She had kind words to say, although it sure caught everyone off guard. We had to laugh because it's amazing how kids don't know to be scared or worried about the right things to say. They just put it out there. I wish we could all be a little more like that, sometimes. I feel like people don't know what to say to me, and often, I don't know what to say back. I don't want people to feel like they can't talk to me like they always have. Small talk about insignificant things in life is still ok! I always get awkward though, when a friendly acquaintance says, "How are you doing?" I feel like it's a loaded question and I get weird because I don't know if they're asking how I'm doing in general, or if they know about Mike and they're meaning, how am I doing in this situation? I know this is all on me, and not the person asking. I'm just awkward in general. How do I answer that? I usually just laugh (nervously, I'm sure) and say, "Doing good." or something along those lines. I don't want to make them uncomfortable. Why does cancer have to make everyone so darn uncomfortable? Or is it just me?

Today Mike rode with me to pick up the girls from school because he "needed to get out of this house!" Lucy had dance in the afternoon, so Mike, Molly, our niece Emma, Reid, and myself went to the park for a little bit. He really enjoyed sitting in the shade and watching the kids play. It's nice to have him be part of those moments, even if it's just him watching. Soon he'll be out there chasing Reid down and I'll sit and watch! That kid puts some miles on his shoes!

So I guess tomorrow starts Round 3. We're both dreading it, and yet, we just want to get started and get it over with. First, we have to go to the Dr.'s office and see the Nurse Practitioner to get assessed if he's ready to this round. They'll look at his bloodwork and then admit us into the hospital if (when) everything looks fine. They originally had this appt tomorrow, then scheduled him to go into the hospital on Wednesday. I know it probably doesn't seem like a big deal to them if we are a day late, but to us, every day behind is a day further away from having this in the past.

Saturday night 5-8 our dear friends and family are having a benefit at the VFW in Atchison. They are having a dinner and silent auction. Mike won't be able to make it, obviously, since he'll still be in the hospital. He wishes he could be, though. I am planning on being there, and hope I can thank each and every one of you for all of your support and love. We are so lucky to have so many amazing people in our lives.

XOXO

Robin