Night and Day
A tale of dark and light, yesterday was my day, Dad, with Walker and it was truly an awful, dark day. From the start Walker was in panic mode with high pressures and we had a young male nurse that was inexperienced in dealing with a high anxiety situation. They had to push meds all day just too calm him down off the fence of I can’t breathe. This continued all day long with naps in between the panic for at least some rest but no movement at all in or out of bed :-(. I kept saying I just want this day to end.
Of course, I went home exhausted, defeated, sick to my stomach with worry. Hugged Candy and we dropped to our knees in a prayer of pleading desperation for relief for Walker. The mind being as much if not more so as challenging right now as his body. It seemed that we had stepped 10 steps back instead of 2 back to the early days of ECMO and bringing him out of the panic to breathe mode. Where he succeeded and overcame the odds to walk the halls with the machines in tow.
So after a 4 day run of morning shifts, it was Candy’s turn to take over the am shift, I was toast. I checked in this am and she reports he’s up in the chair and doing good. I arrive at his room @ 4 pm to find Candy and Sherry redecorating his room with new bed sheets and new pillows and lots of positive sayings written all over the windows. His respiratory therapist is installing a new portable vent that’s quiet and Walker is saying “it’s hard to breathe” instead of the I can’t. Wow!
The room is light and airy with a vibe of positive motion to accomplishments of the day. Wow! I am so stinking happy to see this. He is eating a little, talking normally, and generally in good spirits. We learned, as we often do on this medical miracle journey, that because we had been giving him lots to drink over the weekend because he was tolerating it, yeah!!, his fluid build up was such that it was a big part of what caused the panic filled day yesterday. His dialysis took a huge 3 liters off him late yesterday.
Also, they added a new med last night and that combined with the fluid removal made for a much better day today for his Mom. Much better that I had the short straw of yesterday than Mom for sure. And today, Candy was in tip top form as she orchestrated an almost effortless day of good experiences achieved for Walker. She is amazing!
We learned that we need to monitor his fluid intake to avoid the fluid build up that drove an awful day. Now if we could develop a program in hospital ICU’s that gave proactive information to care givers in a timely manner so that they didn’t cause further complications, we would be billionaires. And that Candy ended the day with one of the strongest, most heart felt prayers over Walker I have ever heard was icing on this new day.
Today is the best Father’s Day present I could have asked for because in Gods timing he can turn a dark day into light as each day we are given fresh grace anew. Thank you Father God for today!!! Thank you for all the minor victories today on Walkers journey home!
Comments (11)
So sorry for the continued up and down, but know that the Father has you in the palm of his hands. I have prayed for all of you daily and will continue prayers of calm, peace and comfort for Walker and strength and peace for you, Candy, Laura and Gail
💙 praying that Walker has many more days like today!
I have no words Dave - Thank you Lord that you have the gift of sharing what this journey is like! Prayers - so appreciated! It is difficult to even explain what this is like - unless you are actually "in that room" with this precious guy we love so!!! We will keep the faith - we will trust - and we will fight for him constantly until he can fight for himself - some days it is difficult for us to breath as well - but we keep on - and will!!!
Here is a story that might give you hope...a true story. I don't want to to tell you this for comparison or for "one-upsmanship" or anything like that, just to "post hope". My son, Walker's cousin, Eric Walker was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Disease the summer of his eighteenth year. The cancer was in stage 4B which was the worst it could be. He had an eight hour surgery in August of 1992 (ask Sherry, she was there). It was a grueling surgery and the recovery was awful. Everything that could go wrong did. A couple of days later Hurricane Andrew hit and oh, by the way. he was hospitalized at Miami Jackson in Miami. I lived in Boca Raton and could do nothing but watch the news as the hurricane devastated Miami and points south. Eric turned 19 while he was still there. As I know first hand, there are no words to describe your pain and suffering, much less Walker's pain and suffering. Eric's friends and our family were like members of the United Nations. The people that prayed ranged from The Church of God (Holy Rollers), to the Roman Catholics, to the members of the Jewish faith from Miami to Russia to Israel. Eric is now 45 years old and healthy. I am just trying to say that I truly do believe that prayer saved my son and I truly do believe that prayer is saving your son Walker, too. I love you all so much even though you have never met me. We are family.....WE ARE FAMILY! Tell Walker that God is looking after this family. Never give up . I love you Candy and Sherry. Aunt Karen
Thank you for sharing that Karen. It gives me great hope in knowing your son made it through his ordeal and our Walker will too. If you are even in Orlando please get in touch. God Bless you Dave
I am so glad this message was received by you in the way it was sent...with hope and love and prayers. Lord please help this child of yours. Amen
May God to continue to heal your precious Son and continue to give you all the comfort, strength and endurance to get through these darkest of days. You all truly have ministered to me throughout this journey. Your faith and positive energy alone is truly a testament. Lifting you all up in prayer, as always. 💙
Love as big as the mountains to you!!
we love you all deeply and pray for Walker daily! please tell him that his extended family is cheering him on through our prayers on his behalf! ❤️❤️❤️
Amen!!!!! Walker we believe in you. All things are possible through Christ Our Lord!!!!!
Dave, thank you for taking us in where you all are at with your incredible words. Just as others have said, I lack words, but I am with you as I can in my thoughts and prayers.