Loss and Grief

Hi Caren,

It is strange how much your feelings mirror those of someone who has suffered a loss. When we first lose a loved one, there are cards, flowers, meals brought to the house, phone calls and visits. Later everyone returns to their normal lives and you still feel the pain of the loss and now feel more alone than ever. Your daily life has changed forever.

My friend tells the story of returning from services after the loss of her husband. Her mother was sitting looking out the front window and made a comment of "There is the school bus." My friend says she felt instant rage. "How dare they act like nothing had changed when her whole world had fallen apart. She had lost her best friend and life would never be the same." 

All of those around us are able to heal so much more quickly than we are and they return to their normal lives leaving us to feel even more alone and isolated. 

There is not a day that goes by without all of you remaining in my thoughts and prayers. I never miss an opportunity to read your thoughts and take them into my heart.

Once you are able to travel more freely, I would like to take you to Kalmazoo for a visit with Carl. Carl is my friend, my religious mentor and my doctor. He has given me a lot more than 12 1/2 years where the doctors only promised me 6 months. He understands how the mental anguish and the physical pain are linked to the emotional turmoil you have been through. I know he can not be a regular part of your life; but I want to give you a chance to meet him and gain some of his insight.

I understand that right now an hour drive (one direction) seems like a big mountain to climb. You will let me know when you are feady to face that challenge.