One of the beauties of summer break is the luxury of forgetting the days. This is occasionally inconvenient, but for the most part I'm really enjoying the opportunity to wake up each morning, make myself a cup of coffee, and stand stretching my legs with nothing on my mind other than reading and walking as much as possible. With those reduced responsibilities, I've been able to increase my time on my feet without my braces, and I'm really excited about this new development.[...]

“My eyes fail from weeping,
I am in torment within;
my heart is poured out on the ground
because my people are destroyed,
because children and infants faint
in the streets of the city.”
Lamentations 2:11[...]

I never participated in a trust fall as a team building thing - mostly because I don't trust people, but also because I've seen Gretchen Wiener hit the floor in Mean Girls. I can't help it that I'm popular. [...]

If every week held the emotional and physical extremes last week did, I'd be pretty fried. Fortunately, I had a largely restful week as I gave my attention to reading and walking. I went for a couple walks with Hunter starting at my house and heading south to see how far I could make it. For those familiar with Kandern, I made it from the feuerwehr to the bauhof down the street on Wednesday. For those unfamiliar with Kandern, that's half a kilometer or about a third of a mile. I was elated with this distance, and made it nearly as far the next day - just past the recyclinghof. I worked my legs a little bit again with Anja on Friday and gave them a break most of today just stretching and relaxing the sore muscles. [...]

This week has been incredible - thank you to all of you who fasted along with me and prayed for my ongoing recovery. I still want it all, and I'm still asking for everything everyday. This week I saw some amazing improvements as I ventured outside my house for the first time without my braces. I walked short distances and managed to keep my heels lower on the ground as they made contact with each slow step. The accompanying emotional highs were great, and I was able to share them with many of my friends and students here. One of my students noticed that I showed up at graduation on Saturday wearing a pair of Toms tucked under my blanket. We celebrated together at family group when I walked up the stairs at the Campbell's in a pair of Nikes. It's still not safe for me to take any steps in the Toms, and I have to be careful even the tennis shoes I have because my ankles are still not in my control. (Shout out to any Nike friends who want to hook an Oregon girl up with some high tops - I'm a size 8.5!) I'm praising God for this massive improvement though as I make literal strides away from assistive devices. [...]

Every time I learn a new function, my walking slows down significantly. I need to return my focus and attention to the new detail in my gait, and it slows me down considerably. Today during therapy, Anja and I went for a walk outside without my braces. She told me to slow down as I took the unstable steps on the uneven ground. I was so excited to feel the contact of the ground in my feet. It's still an incredible sensation for me to feel the flex and stretch in my calve as my ankle moves in each step. I didn't realize how much I missed it after two years of the stiff ankle locked in my braces. In our hour session today, I made it a short distance outside and practiced some side steps as well. Walking back into the practice, Anja joked, "Do you even need your braces anymore?" [...]

I loved the feeling of walking without my braces so much, I tried again a couple times with Hunter last week. It was just as incredible the second and third time, but I'll be honest, it was just as exhausting too. I wrapped up my classes for the semester, and I walked several rounds in the auditorium, and this week has taken it's toll on my energy. I was completely spent on Sunday, and it doesn't help that I haven't been sleeping well the last week. There are loads of factors going into my holistic care, and I'm working to pay attention to all of them while finishing all my responsibilities at school this week before graduation. [...]

Hunter gave me the title for this week's entry; more importantly he gave me his shoes. I didn't walk a mile in them, but I did walk the first thirty feet without my braces in two years. [...]

Oops, I skipped posting last weekend. Things begin to get crazy around BFA during the month of May. Students turn their brains off, and teachers have to fight with them to turn their brains back on until finals. There's new content to cover, late work to grade, and various responsibilities to deal with around school. I also have visa paperwork, medical bills, insurance claims, and therapy rides on my radar in addition to still trying to be a good teacher. [...]

Christians do weird stuff. From the outside, I imagine baptism looks like one of those weird things. However, from the inside, it is one of the greatest parts of the Christian family. Baptism is done differently across denominations, but it's always a celebration. This morning I got to celebrate eight people declaring their faith in Jesus and desire to live for him. [...]