It is almost three months since we returned to Santa Barbara. Coming "home" has felt like a step back. I knew I was being hopeful when I thought I could just leave Porlock buried in Oxford. That goal of keeping my mind positive and free from cancer thoughts has been harder than I imagined. My emotions swing like a giant wrecking ball from depression to disbelief and back again. When I am feeling emotionally stable and happy, my brain thinks: this can't possibly be happening. When I feel the full force of my disease, my brain descends into despondency. I have yet to know how to be content in the same moment that I am with my diagnosis. It makes me feel bipolar: how can these two realities coexist? I'm working on it. I have started going to counseling at the Cancer Center and Hospice. Part of my homework is to write down my negative thoughts and learn to replace them with positive thoughts. I have also been attending the "young survivors support group," nutritional counseling, yoga classes, and Reki, and will start a neuropathy program in January. It feels like I am at the CC every day, I hate that this is my reality. But for now it is helpful, and the support is great, so I go. [...]
Michelle Kendall - Journal
Read Entries & Updates
Welcome to the Michelle Kendall support family! This site is for family and friends, old and new, to organize our efforts to support this extraordinary person. This page will serve as your home base for rallying the troops, receiving updates to support Michelle Kendall . Here's the plan:
Your First Step: Please take 30 seconds to click on the "Follow" button on the top right of this page. This will allow you to receive updates, read journal entries, make donations, share Michelle Kendall ’s story on social media, and help the family with week-to-week calendaring needs. Though not mandatory to follow Michelle Kendall ’s page, we encourage you to easily create an account with your name and email in order to be able to post photos, leave comments and sign up as a helping hand on the Calendar page. Feel free to upload a photo of yourself to your profile so we can get to know and recognize others on Michelle Kendall ’s support team. After clicking “Follow” above, read on to learn more about what you can do to help.
Journal: This tab is where you can read the latest entries posted for Michelle Kendall and our support team. You may see additional authors writing updates here to help alleviate pressure for Michelle Kendall and expedite information sharing. Each post is followed by a photo and name of the author of the entry. You can reply with supportive comments to any journal entry, or click on the name of its author to send a private message.
Posts: This is where you can leave an encouraging message for Michelle Kendall and family, and to read thoughts left by others! If you have something pressing you'd like suggest that everyone sees (e.g. a fundraiser or upcoming event you're spearheading), please don't hesitate to contact us via private message so we can consider sharing it more widely in the Journal sections. There will undoubtedly be many coordinated efforts and events ahead, and we want to make certain they’re organized and publicized through this site to help drive the greatest possible impact.
Calendar: Please see this important section to learn what the family needs NOW. This will be an especially helpful section for locals in close proximity to Michelle Kendall . This is an up-to-date calendar which will list the family's immediate needs such as child-care, rides, and meals to help most in the short term. If you see a need posted and can fill it, please sign up through the calendar page directly (i.e. not through private communication) to let us and others know that you've committed to that need. Please check back often to help out with the most recently posted needs!
Notifications: After clicking “Follow” above, you’ll then see a tab to manage “Notifications”. If you feel you’re receiving too many or too few email notifications, please check this section to tailor notifications to your areas of interest. For example, if you want to receive journal updates but not new calendar posts, or any combination of notifications from this site, you can do set them to your preference this section.
Don’t Forget! If you haven’t done so already, please click “Follow” on the top right. It’s your very next step to showing your support!